在加拿大
刚才题目打错字了 尊敬的各位姐妹兄弟，一个华裔的同学老公上周六不幸去世，留下了4个孩子，最大的6年级，最小的3岁，没有一个亲人在这边。同学老公的尸体昨天刚刚找到，在这个最困难的时期，最需要帮助，因为我知道这边的葬礼是很贵的。希望大家能伸出你的双手，力所能及。我们将在周五早上11点开始在bowvalley college一楼为同学捐款，希望大家能帮助一下。捐款时间是改成了周五早上9点到下午3点，在bowvalley college student association 在2楼，我们设立了一个小箱子和一个笔记本，请直接到那里。谢谢vivian谢谢大家 下面的连接是同学老公周日失踪时候的新闻：http://www.abchinese.com/cgi-bin/topic.cgi?forum=36&topic=9885&show=0vivian
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08年登录改专业从国内的会计读了护士13年1月在加拿大某医院开始做护士 赏
反馈:Canadianpatriot, 小螃蟹, benkok 和另外1个人 2012-08-09#2 
86 $0.00 回复: 呼唤捐款几点结束呀？ 周四、五夜班，周五白天要睡觉。评论
五味消毒饮，出自 《医宗金鉴》，清热解毒，消散疔疮。金银花（15克） 野菊花（6克） 蒲公英（6克） 紫背天葵子（6克） 紫花地丁（6克） 花 . 花 . 公 . （子拜） . 天 . 地回复: 呼唤捐款请问是那个攀崖
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回复: 呼唤捐款要所有有捐款意向的人在一个指定时间到一个指定地点去，比较困难， 因为每个人都有自己的时间安排。面向公众捐款要设立一个银行账户，最好是申请政府批准的可以抵税的慈善账户。建议到华枫去发个贴，那边老移民比较多，大多过了新移民的困难时期，经济条件比较好，可以筹到更多的善款。银行账户设立前， 捐现金的话，要说明怎么捐，谁收集？收集现金至少要2人同时互证。或者跟泠泠、秀红版主讨论一下，以家园网卡板的名义筹集，需要几个义工同时工作。
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回复: 呼唤捐款让人很难过的事件，愿他一路走好。望他的家人早日走出阴霾，生活顺利。我没有组织过捐款，也没有经验，还是不以论坛的形式集中组织了。楼主可以采纳雪花的意见，申请抵税慈善帐户，公布帐号。有心的网友自愿捐助。--一点题外话：作为这样家庭的主力真该买个人身保险，保个20-30万的10年term,每个月花费不过20，30块钱，可以让家人和孩子有足够的生活保障。真的比出了事情，号召捐款实际多了。
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移民14年，From Calgary AB to Nanaimo BC。回复: 呼唤捐款捐款时间是改成了周五早上9点到下午3点，在bowvalley college student association 在2楼，我们设立了一个小箱子和一个笔记本，请直接到那里，谢谢，因为我明天中午12点半-2点半有final考试，我忘记了差点。谢谢
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08年登录改专业从国内的会计读了护士13年1月在加拿大某医院开始做护士要所有有捐款意向的人在一个指定时间到一个指定地点去，比较困难， 因为每个人都有自己的时间安排。 面向公众捐款要设立一个银行账户，最好是申请政府批准的可以抵税的慈善账户。 建议到华枫去发个贴，那边老移民比较多，大多过了新移民的困难时期，经济条件比较好，可以筹到更多的善款。 银行账户设立前， 捐现金的话，要说明怎么捐，谁收集？收集现金至少要2人同时互证。 或者跟泠泠、秀红版主讨论一下，以家园网卡板的名义筹集，需要几个义工同时工作。点击展开...捐款箱放在学校的2楼学生处。我不会拿了钱跑路的，捐不捐是大家的一点心意，各家有各家的困难，这个我理解，但是不要以小人之心说君子之腹。更何况箱子是由我们班几个同学送到这个同学家里的。
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08年登录改专业从国内的会计读了护士13年1月在加拿大某医院开始做护士让人很难过的事件，愿他一路走好。望他的家人早日走出阴霾，生活顺利。我没有组织过捐款，也没有经验，还是不以论坛的形式集中组织了。楼主可以采纳雪花的意见，申请抵税慈善帐户，公布帐号。有心的网友自愿捐助。--一点题外话：作为这样家庭的主力真该买个人身保险，保个20-30万的10年term,每个月花费不过20，30块钱，可以让家人和孩子有足够的生活保障。真的比出了事情，号召捐款实际多了。点击展开...谢谢各位的关心，今天我们班好几个人知道消息都哭了。每家有每家的困难，对于2个大人都是学生来讲，买额外的人寿保险不是那么容易的事情。现在唯一要解决的是让他们家度过这个困难，因为我知道在加拿大一个葬礼加墓地最少都1-2万加币，而且他们没一个亲人在加拿大，太可怜了，而且我们还有一个学期就毕业了，最后一个学期一共5个月的医院实习，这5个人没有人在家里support是不可能完成的，因为我们早班都要早上6点半就要到医院，要是下午班回到家也晚上快11点了，对于家里有不到4岁的孩子家庭，没有老公在家，那是不可能完成的事情。同学是很坚强，昨天来我家告诉我这个事情她没哭反而我哭了。天都塌了，什么事情还是安全第一。
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08年登录改专业从国内的会计读了护士13年1月在加拿大某医院开始做护士请问是那个攀崖点击展开...是的，尸体昨天送回来calgary了
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08年登录改专业从国内的会计读了护士13年1月在加拿大某医院开始做护士谢谢各位的关心，今天我们班好几个人知道消息都哭了。每家有每家的困难，对于2个大人都是学生来讲，买额外的人寿保险不是那么容易的事情。现在唯一要解决的是让他们家度过这个困难，因为我知道在加拿大一个葬礼加墓地最少都1-2万加币，而且他们没一个亲人在加拿大，太可怜了，而且我们还有一个学期就毕业了，最后一个学期一共5个月的医院实习，这5个人没有人在家里support是不可能完成的，因为我们早班都要早上6点半就要到医院，要是下午班回到家也晚上快11点了，对于家里有不到4岁的孩子家庭，没有老公在家，那是不可能完成的事情。同学是很坚强，昨天来我家告诉我这个事情她没哭反而我哭了。天都塌了，什么事情还是安全第一。点击展开...我理解你的心情.我们上学的时候也有同学突然离世.家里人只能面对如此的凄凉景象.我不知道该如何安慰你们？只是知道如此的捐款其实募不到多少钱,千八百块而已，只是杯水车薪，解决不了什么问题。真要解决问题的话，还是要求助一些社团或机构，有专人办理才好。关于保险，一个月2，30块，比低收入月票都要少，无论生活如何拮据，这点钱还是值得出的。其实，越是经济窘迫的时候，越是要想到为家人和孩子着想。也许这话，我不该在你的这个帖子里说，但真的是肺腑之言。
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移民14年，From Calgary AB to Nanaimo BC。捐款箱放在学校的2楼学生处。我不会拿了钱跑路的，捐不捐是大家的一点心意，各家有各家的困难，这个我理解，但是不要以小人之心说君子之腹。更何况箱子是由我们班几个同学送到这个同学家里的。点击展开...我仔细看了雪花的帖子，她完全没有怀疑或恶意，真的是很好的建议，而且是一些募捐的经验之谈。你可能心情不好，误解她了。-------------还有，明天就是周五了，时间这么紧，大概很多人没时间去银行取现金，能否告知家属的姓名和地址，方便有些朋友邮寄或送支票？
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移民14年，From Calgary AB to Nanaimo BC。回复: 呼唤捐款A SURVIVAL GUIDE FOR WIDOWS By Niki Hayden
Michelle Davison was making tea one afternoon when she noticed a police car in front of her house. An officer and two women, later identified as victim advocates, walked toward the front door. When she saw lines of sorrow in their faces, the instinctive question was about her children. "Are my kids alright?" she asked. "Yes, your kids are fine," the officer replied. Then the words spilled out: "A private place to speak…high-speed car crash…husband was innocent." David had been killed on his way to the airport. He left a widow and four children. Michelle joined over half a million women in the United States that year widowed under the age of 45. In the case of sudden death, a woman is forced to make life-altering decisions in a short period of time. Many women find themselves almost sleepwalking through the stages that followthe funeral, digging out financial forms, filing for Social Security. If you know someone who has been widowed recently, experts in both financial and psychological professions say that friends can make a difference. Knowing how to help a newly widowed friend may bring more than solace. You may be able to head off hasty and disastrous financial decisions. And, you may be able to keep your friend in touch with a caring community. Here’s a blueprint for both of you. FOR THE WIDOW: GO SLOWLY "You’re in a compromised mental state," says Kim Mooney, Community Bereavement and Education Coordinator for Hospice of Colorado. "Don’t make decisions for a year. Move through a grief process. Recognize that there is a period of depressive grief. Medication may be helpful, but sometimes it’s inappropriate. Know that your life is going to change everyday. For individual counseling, find the right person, find a grief-educated professional." That’s because depressive grief is different from clinical depression. Counselors, groups of the newly widowed, hospice retreats--all are trained in acknowledging that grief doesn’t follow set stages. Each individual walks through those twilight moments of mourning differently. A grief-trained counselor will recognize your individuality. You may attend programs held by Colorado Hospice whether or not your husband was involved with the organization before his death. And you need not attend right awayeven a year later is not too late. FOR THE FRIEND: UNDERSTAND THE IMPORTANCE OF GRIEF Confused thinking, aimlessness, appetite and sleep changes are signs of internalized grief. "Our bodies aren’t going to lie to us," says family therapist David Dalke, who treats families suffering from traumatic loss. "I don’t know that we totally heal. I think that’s something that we plant on other people Sometimes the pain is so great, the loss is so devastating, we live with it and through it and it accompanies us," he says. While there’s no codified way to mourn, the bereaved know their footsteps feel heavier; dream and waking hours have fuzzy outlines; time appears out of kilter. As a friend, counselor Patricia Kelly suggests, "Acknowledge that this person is in the midst of a trauma. At some point they’re going to feel the loss and be in a grief process. It will get more vivid for them although they’re on automatic pilot right now. Recognize that the pain may get worse, even a year down the road. There’s no time limit on this. Sometimes being there means just that. Tell them that you’re just going to sit in the living room and read your book, but you’re available." Throughout the first year, grief will be triggered by anniversaries: the first family holiday, a birthday, or a graduation. Mooney describes grief as delayed, sometimes deferred: "Grief often happens after shock, when you begin to feel safe. This I see often with teenagers. And women who were never married but partnered for 40 years experience disenfranchised grief." The mourning may spill out months later, much to the shock and disbelief of family and friends. That’s why friends are afraid to bring up the death. They worry that it will trigger crying and then the wound will be opened. "Talking is always better than not talking about death," Dalke says. Those who have lost a husband long to share their memories. It’s a time not to move away from a bereaved friend, but to move closer. Listen to her. Keeping a grief-stricken friend in a community, whether it’s a shared religious faith, a group of friends, a street of neighbors, a collection of working colleagues, is important. FOR THE FRIEND: REALIZE THAT KIDS ARE DIFFERENT Sometimes children will defer their grief because they are trying to protect their mother and allow her to grieve. Children will wait until they feel safe to express anger and grief. They’ve been waiting for their mother to be strong enough to console them. "Keep in mind that the children lose the parent who has died. They also lose a little of the parent who is still here because they’ve been taken away by the process," Kelly says. "Often there’s anger at the mom or dad who died. Anger is a common way that kids express sadness. To adults that may seem bizarre." Friends can help by trying to normalize a situation: "I’ll pick up the kids from soccer this season." Or, contribute to household chores: "I’ll bring over a Sunday dinner each week." Include the kids by asking what they like to eat. Offer to mow the lawn, take the dog for a walkanything that relieves everyday burdens and contributes to the rhythm of ordinary life. Children and even teens may need their mom or adult friend to talk to the school principal or teachers. An adult friend can remain a connection with a community that continues a routine, but also indicates a caring response. "The parent has to do their work to come back around and fully be there for their children. There are things that a parent cannot do with their children that they once did. As a friend, let them not feel guilty about that," Kelly says. FOR THE WIDOW: COLLECT FINANCIAL DOCUMENTS Gather financial documents, beginning with the latest tax return. "That will tell you what investments you have, and all about Uncle Harry’s bonds," says George Tamm, vice-president of investments at A.G. Edwards & Sons in Longmont. It will also give you information on any tax advisors your husband may have used. Ask your friend to make phone calls if it’s too difficult for you to set up appointments. When you meet with any advisor or a Social Security administrator, consider taking a trusted friend with you. If you forget details, your friend is likely to remember. Then look at household expenses and get a ballpark figure of the income you will need. Experts suggest it will take about 80 percent of your former income to meet expenses. "This an accounting activity, it’s not emotional," Tamm says, "The difficult part is that this is taking place at an grief-stricken time. Often people try to help those in stress and want to fix things quickly. They’ll offer advice but most are misinformed, not professional, or not objective. It’s important not to jump at any schemes or big changes." Look for the will, bank accounts, mutual funds and brokerage accounts, a safe deposit box, titles to cars, your home mortgage, medical insurance papers (see our health insurance section next), life insurance, social security benefits, retirement or 401-K accounts, credit cards, unpaid salary, IRA accounts, workman’s compensation benefits, military discharge papers, employer’s benefit statements. You’ll need copies of your husband’s death certificate (usually obtained from the mortuary or county health department) to begin transferring accounts into your own name. You may need to update your will. If you are faced with a life insurance settlement, it won’t be taxed. Look at high debt, Tamm suggests, like credit cards, and consider using insurance money to become more solvent. Life insurance is also appropriate to pay education bills for your children. But if you receive your husband’s 401-K plan or Individual Retirement Account, realize that it will be taxed once you use it for income. This may be the right vehicle to roll over into your own IRA so that taxes will continue deferred. These are two big lump sums of money that widows often receive. Understanding the tax consequences before dipping into these funds is essential. Financial advice, Tamm says, must be crafted on a customized basis. Every widow is different. Again, you don’t have to make decisions immediately. "Put the money in Treasury Bills or a money market fund," he suggests: "You don’t have to invest right away. You can do that over time." Eventually you’ll have all the financial facts and will need to decide where you want to be in one year, five years or ten. If you need an advisor, find one who listens to you, pays attention and treats you like an individual. Even women who have spent little time with the family money can become excellent investors. "Women will listen, evaluate and understand the big picture," Tamm says. FOR THE WIDOW: FIND OUT ABOUT HEALTH INSURANCE Health insurance becomes a major task when the entire family relied upon the father’s benefits. According to Susan Gambrill, special assistant to the Colorado Insurance Commissioner, laws that cover dependents fall into either state or federal jurisdiction. Under federal law, dependents would be offered COBRA, (Consolidated Omnibus Budget Reconciliation Act), which means that a widow and dependents would be eligible to continue their current coverage up to 36 months. They may be charged premiums of up to 102 percent of the employer’s cost. But COBRA applies only to companies that have 20 or more employees. For information go to: www.dol.gov/dol/topic/health-plans/cobra.htm A similar benefit existing under Colorado law covers dependents of any company regardless of the number of employees, but only for 18 months. To find more information, go to www.dora.state.co.us/insurance/ and find the main menu. Another federal law is Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act , or HIPPA. This law means that you can get access to health insurance if you’ve been denied insurance--providing you file within 62 days. "It provides access, but not necessarily affordable insurance," Gambrill says. In other cases, a widow must find her own health insurance. She might have the option to buy. But the price often escalates. There is a Cover Colorado plan that serves as a safety net for children whose family income is too high for Medicaid, but too low for private premium payments. It’s currently in a state of flux and bound to go through legislative changes. Again, check with the website listed above for the Colorado Insurance Commissioner’s office. Medicaid provides some health care for the indigent. Their rules are complex. To see if you qualify, call the County Department of Social Services where you live for an appointment. Each county has its own department. The telephone number for Denver is 303-866-3513. Outside that metro area, dial 1-800-211-3943. FOR THE WIDOW: CALL SOCIAL SECURITY You may call the national telephone number of Social Security to set up a local appointment at the site nearest you. That number is 800-772-1213. To find the closest office, go to the website s3abaca.ssa.gov/pro/fol/fol-home.html. There you’ll type in your zip code to pull up the nearest office. Collect your husband’s death certificate, both his and your social security number, marriage certificate, your children’s social security numbers, his recent tax return, also the name and address of your bank as well as your account number. This is so a check can be direct deposited. To find the "Survivor’s Benefits" booklet online, go to www.ssa.gov/pubs/10084.html. Unlike the health insurance maze that overwhelms widows and their children, Social Security has a decent record of support. Survivor’s benefits are tax-free and may amount to more than you realize. If both you and your husband had been collecting Social Security benefits, you will receive the larger of the two. FOR THE FRIEND: TELL THEM THEY HAVE A FUTURE Eventually widows rediscover that their world is rich and wonderful. New family rituals are created. "If Dad was here, what would he say?" becomes a memory incorporated into anniversaries. It may take two or three years, but widows move beyond coping. "It’s important that we not become professional at coping. ‘I’m coping,’ after a year means they’re not getting very far. There comes a time, each in our own way when we have to grow," Dalke says. Widows instinctively recognize that time. "We’re a new family now," Michelle says, several years after the death of David. Given time and support, resilience and strength take over. Let your friend know she will move forward with the things that bring her joy; she and her children have a future. 评论
回复: 呼唤捐款hope this article can help a little.
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回复: 呼唤捐款hope this article can help a little.点击展开...你转的是美国的例子呀，有没有加拿大的?加拿大survivor benefit 连接http://www.servicecanada.gc.ca/eng/isp/cpp/survivor.shtml
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移民14年，From Calgary AB to Nanaimo BC。回复: 呼唤捐款什么时候的事，我怎么不知道，你的那个新闻连接也看不到啊。
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既来之则安之回复: 呼唤捐款是韩国人，不是中国人。
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既来之则安之是韩国人，不是中国人。点击展开...楼主第一句话就说了,死者的妻子是华裔,现在是帮这个华裔.
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移民14年，From Calgary AB to Nanaimo BC。捐款箱放在学校的2楼学生处。我不会拿了钱跑路的，捐不捐是大家的一点心意，各家有各家的困难，这个我理解，但是不要以小人之心说君子之腹。更何况箱子是由我们班几个同学送到这个同学家里的。点击展开...理解你的心情，我明天一天都很忙，没有时间去downtown，这个周末都很忙，不过可以在下个礼拜另外约个时间，约个方便的地方，交给你 $100 转给你的同学，那个遇难者家属。
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回复: 呼唤捐款今天中午，利用午餐时间去了募捐现场.楼主和她的同学正在进行考试.周围没有见到中国人,有个黑皮肤的女孩张罗这个事情.还有两三个人好象是学校的雇员.因为支票的抬头需要知道受捐者的姓名，于是知道她叫Claire.于是大致给他们写了几句话,然后把支票放进募捐箱就走了.本来打算问一下家庭电话，以便帮另外两位完成捐款意向,但是学校的人说这个是隐私，不能透露.如果楼主能联系到事主的话，能否给个联系方式?因为华枫还有两位朋友想捐款，尽点心意,本来委托我.可是我没有任何的联系方式，无法帮忙.
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移民14年，From Calgary AB to Nanaimo BC。我理解你的心情.我们上学的时候也有同学突然离世.家里人只能面对如此的凄凉景象.我不知道该如何安慰你们？只是知道如此的捐款其实募不到多少钱,千八百块而已，只是杯水车薪，解决不了什么问题。真要解决问题的话，还是要求助一些社团或机构，有专人办理才好。关于保险，一个月2，30块，比低收入月票都要少，无论生活如何拮据，这点钱还是值得出的。其实，越是经济窘迫的时候，越是要想到为家人和孩子着想。也许这话，我不该在你的这个帖子里说，但真的是肺腑之言。点击展开...谢谢冷冷，真是不知道如何才能帮到他们。刚刚从同学家里回来，她住的离我家不远，她也在arbour lake，今天才得知原来她的房子是租的，一个月还1700加币，留下4个孩子，小的那个比我家小儿子才大1岁多，太可怜了，太惨了，她老公的葬礼她选了个价格最低的要6500加币，而且他们也不买墓地，她告诉我到时候是把尸体火化后，把骨灰拿到他老公死的那个山上，然后撒在哪里。我知道他们估计买不起墓地。太可怜了。
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