在加拿大
笑话是其次,学英语是关键,不要一笑而过,或一傻而走。如果你有没有看懂含义,至少英文你是要学会的!这些英语,你在课本里是绝对看不到的!为学地道英语,三观全颠倒!节操碎一地! 在超市里妻子拿起两根黄瓜自言自语道:“一根用来吃,一根用来乐!” 旁边一小个子老太太听得差点心脏病都吓出来,于是我对她说:“您别听她瞎说,开玩笑呢,她其实一点儿都不喜欢吃黄瓜――另一根是用来塞菊花的!” 老太太扑了My wife picked up two cucumbers in Tesco and said "One for food, one for fun."A little old lady nearly had a heart attackso I said to her, "She's only joking, she doesn't like cucumber. The other one is for her arse."Finished her off. Tesco这个不用说了。英国一和大型超市A little old lady 小老太太nearly 机会,差一点She's only joking 她在开玩笑arse。。自己去查字典吧。。。。。。不解释
评论
Frisch weht der Wind,Der Heimat zu,Mein Irish Kind,Wo weilest du? 赏 反馈:伟丰装修 和 劏猪佬 2012-08-14#2
烽火移民路
31,849 $0.00 回复: 英语冷笑话,你看得懂吗“我能不能管警官叫傻 逼呢?” “不行,先生,那是侮辱执法人员。” “那要是我管个傻逼叫警官又行不行呢?” “那应该没有问题吧,当然是比较奇怪,不过法律上没有什么问题。” “好的。那晚安啊,警官。”"Am I allowed to call a police officer a cunt?""No, sir, you are not. That would be an insult.""Would it be OK if I called a cunt 'Officer'?""Yes, sir. That would be weird, but allowed.""Good night, Officer." a cunt= 傻 逼评论
Frisch weht der Wind,Der Heimat zu,Mein Irish Kind,Wo weilest du?回复: 英语冷笑话,你看得懂吗看到一男士护肤用品的广告,画外音说:“当美与力相遇,将会发生什么呢?” 呃,强 JIAN?So in the Dove advert, the voice over asks, 'What happens when beauty meets strength?'Er, rape? the voice over话外音rape强 JIAN(JIAN字竟然不显示。。。)
评论
Frisch weht der Wind,Der Heimat zu,Mein Irish Kind,Wo weilest du?回复: 英语冷笑话,你看得懂吗今天我跟儿子解释了性事,我给了他许多忠告和建议,也提醒了他一些需要避免的危险,但他完全没听进去。 他全程都躺那儿嚼奶嘴(这个早教太早了吧。。。I was talking to my son about sex today. I gave him plenty of advice and told him about some of the dangers. He didn't listen though.He just lay there chewing his rattle. )plenty of advice 很多建议,很多忠告
评论
Frisch weht der Wind,Der Heimat zu,Mein Irish Kind,Wo weilest du?回复: 英语冷笑话,你看得懂吗坐在咖啡厅盯着一个金发妹子吃香蕉,一抬头正撞见我的视线,只见她开始不断地吮吸香蕉、边向我飞媚眼边说:“怎么样,很诱惑吧?” “那是非常!”我回答,“真特么想吃香蕉啊……(我想歪了吗?那年代,黄瓜还是黄瓜。。香蕉还是香蕉。。)I was sat in a cafe earlier when a blonde looked up to catch me watching her eat her banana.She started sucking on it, gave me a wink and said, "Teasing you, am I?""You sure are" I replied, "I could murder a banana right now." a blonde金发女郎Teasing you, am I诱惑吗?
评论
Frisch weht der Wind,Der Heimat zu,Mein Irish Kind,Wo weilest du?回复: 英语冷笑话,你看得懂吗--老婆打电话来:“我在超市买牛奶呢,你要带点什么不?” My wife called me and said, "I'm just in Tesco getting some milk, do you need anything?" 特易购(TESCO)公司成立于1932年,是英国最大的零售公司,--“看情况你开车去的还是走路去的?” "It depends" I replied, "Did you drive or walk?" It depends看情况,取决于--“走路来的。” She said, "I walked." “那帮我买六麻袋土豆加四个西瓜谢谢”"I'll have six bags of potatoes and four watermelons please."
评论
Frisch weht der Wind,Der Heimat zu,Mein Irish Kind,Wo weilest du?回复: 英语冷笑话,你看得懂吗男人见到女人,最先注意到的地方,就是女人的双眼。 然后呢,等到她没在看的时候,他就去盯着咪咪了 The first thing a man notices in a woman are her eyes.And, when her eyes aren't looking, he notices her tits... tits 就是乳头的意思。。。ass 是屁股的意思,很不雅。
评论
Frisch weht der Wind,Der Heimat zu,Mein Irish Kind,Wo weilest du?回复: 英语冷笑话,你看得懂吗我常对妻子说:“我就是喜欢你现在的样子,没有必要去改变自己啊!” 可她从来不听。 总是变得越来越胖.I always tell me wife, "I love you just the way you are".But she never listens. She just goes and puts on more weight. I love you just the way you are~这句不错,男生要会哦~
评论
Frisch weht der Wind,Der Heimat zu,Mein Irish Kind,Wo weilest du?回复: 英语冷笑话,你看得懂吗和妻子一起去镇上吃晚餐,回程路上我们的车在红灯区里抛了锚。 不一会儿,六个妓女围到了我们的车边.其中一个开了口:“嘿老斯!这娘们儿不是我们这块的啊满身肥肉,丫没多收你钱吧啊?The wife and I went into town for dinner last night and on the way back the car broke down in the red light district.six prostitutes circling the car until one of them said, "Hi Stu! She's not from our patch - I hope the fat bitch isn't charging you over the odds!" the car broke down 车抛锚了prostitutes .妓 女Stu 老头,老家伙 More jokes here http://forum.canadameet.tv/showthread.php?p=8377304&posted=1#post8377304
评论
Frisch weht der Wind,Der Heimat zu,Mein Irish Kind,Wo weilest du?回复: 英语冷笑话,你看得懂吗进了麦当劳,我径直走到柜台前对收银员说:“给我一份巨无霸套餐谢谢。”她用眼神指了指旁边排着的长队:“那你旁边这些排着队的十个人呢?” “不用,他们跟我不是一起的I walked straight up to the counter at McDonald's and said to the cashier, "I'll have a Big Mac meal, please.""What about the 10 people that are queuing beside you?" she asked."Nothing for them," I said. "They're not with me."walk straight up径直走过去 cashier收银员are queuing正在排队
评论
Frisch weht der Wind,Der Heimat zu,Mein Irish Kind,Wo weilest du? 赏 反馈:Rita_vine 2012-08-14#11
烽火移民路
31,849 $0.00 回复: 英语冷笑话,你看得懂吗买了一包阿斯达的玉米片,包装盒上印着“100%由再生纸制成”。 怪不得味道像屎一样啊I bought Asda own brand Cornflakes the other day. It said on the box, "Made from 100% recycled paper."No wonder they tasted like shit. Cornflakes玉米片recycled paper再生纸tasted like shit.吃起来象屎一样评论
Frisch weht der Wind,Der Heimat zu,Mein Irish Kind,Wo weilest du?回复: 英语冷笑话,你看得懂吗切,我室友骂我不该偷看他的邮件,多大点事儿啊。 就为这,我就不告诉他他下个星期二有个面试!I can't believe my flatmate accused me of opening his mail.Cheeky cunt.Just for that, I'm not going to tell him he's got a job interview next Tuesday. accuse of 因某事控告某人 Cheeky cunt.是一句粗话,类似于“*”Cheeky厚脸皮的;无耻的 cunt 粗女性之阴部 2. 俚淫妇 3. 粗**a job interview 面试
评论
Frisch weht der Wind,Der Heimat zu,Mein Irish Kind,Wo weilest du?回复: 英语冷笑话,你看得懂吗前几天买了条新项链,但是每次戴上后皮肤就会有点发青,我一直怀疑是不是假货。 后来发现是条24K纯金的手链I bought a new necklace earlier that made my skin go a funny blue colour so I suspected it was a rip off.Turns out it was a 24ct gold bracelet. 竟然没有被勒死。。。I bought a new necklace earlier 大家注意这个 earlier 的用法,在这里可以表示前段时间,前几天的意思。skin go a funny blue colour 皮肤发青 rip off俚欺骗,劣质品。有很多意思,有兴趣的同学可以查一下字典
评论
Frisch weht der Wind,Der Heimat zu,Mein Irish Kind,Wo weilest du?回复: 英语冷笑话,你看得懂吗每次我在超市购物、看到有女性拿起一根黄瓜的时候,我都会冲她们挤眉弄眼地猥琐一笑……就是为了看看有多少姑娘会飞快地红着脸把黄瓜放回去Whenever I'm in the supermarket and I see a woman picking up a cucumber, I give them a little wink and a smile... just to see how many go red and put it back. pick up拿起cucumber黄瓜little wink and a smile挤眉弄眼
评论
Frisch weht der Wind,Der Heimat zu,Mein Irish Kind,Wo weilest du?回复: 英语冷笑话,你看得懂吗是不是有些是英式英语,感觉和美式英语有点区别。
评论
回复: 英语冷笑话,你看得懂吗每次我在超市购物、看到有女性拿起一根黄瓜的时候,我都会冲她们挤眉弄眼地猥琐一笑……就是为了看看有多少姑娘会飞快地红着脸把黄瓜放回去Whenever I'm in the supermarket and I see a woman picking up a cucumber, I give them a little wink and a smile... just to see how many go red and put it back. pick up拿起cucumber黄瓜little wink and a smile挤眉弄眼点击展开...这孩子太坏啦。
评论
钢琴购买攻略(钱多得没地方花的免入)专营日本二手YAMAHA/KAWAI钢琴的批发与零售,服务大温13年,在日本设有工厂收购、检定、修整各类二手钢琴,在大温地区还可提供钢琴出租、搬运、调音服务。详情浏览加拿大钢琴超市或致电 604-306-2563微信号:pianosuperstore是不是有些是英式英语,感觉和美式英语有点区别。点击展开...看到Tesco就知道这是英式英语。。。
评论
Frisch weht der Wind,Der Heimat zu,Mein Irish Kind,Wo weilest du?回复: 英语冷笑话,你看得懂吗看不懂啊,感觉没什么好幽默的啊。
评论
回复: 英语冷笑话,你看得懂吗前几天买了条新项链,但是每次戴上后皮肤就会有点发青,我一直怀疑是不是假货。 后来发现是条24K纯金的手链I bought a new necklace earlier that made my skin go a funny blue colour so I suspected it was a rip off.Turns out it was a 24ct gold bracelet. 竟然没有被勒死。。。 I bought a new necklace earlier 大家注意这个 earlier 的用法,在这里可以表示前段时间,前几天的意思。skin go a funny blue colour 皮肤发青 rip off俚欺骗,劣质品。有很多意思,有兴趣的同学可以查一下字典点击展开...笑翻了。funny blue color ...
评论
回复: 英语冷笑话,你看得懂吗真冷,和中国的幽默也差不多。西人笑点超低,而且有时他们大笑是客气,好像鼓掌的意思。
·中文新闻 悉尼铁路工会纠纷:避免火车混乱的协议细节浮出水面
·中文新闻 为什么比尔·肖顿体现了澳大利亚政治最好和最坏的一面